let’s get uncomfortable

by joy soaked words

I am sitting in church in the box, a bible study that has turned into a regular occurrence because somebody said let’s do it.

I’m sitting in church in the box, hearing the words, “I am.”

Christ says “I am.”

Those words stop the enemy in its path. Those words have casted out demons, and set a bush on fire. Those words have been spoken by God. Those words are power. Those words are love. He doesn’t need to say what he is, because he is everything. “I am.”

These past couple of days, I have had such a heart of thankfulness. My heart has been overflowing with how good God is. I locked myself in the bathroom the other night, sat on the counter and started crying. I was crying because God is good. I was feeling so overwhelmed and blessed, that it started leaking out of me.

The pastor is preaching, God’s will be done.

There is so much I want to do in life. But I know I need to take a step back, and ask for his will to be done in my life.

I need to step back. I need to surrender.

I also need to ask myself if I’m ready.

That’s a big prayer. That’s a huge prayer. For him to come in with his will, and for my will to leave.

Am I ready?

I know I’m holding on to things I need to let go of. I’m holding on to the thought of me needing to find a Godly man. I know there’s this fear in me, that if I let that go, that I won’t get married. I know I’m holding on to the idea of a life that has 4 kids, a nice house and a good job. I know I’m holding onto these things, because I’m scared if I let them go, they aren’t going to happen.

My Father reminds me that “I am.” He reminds me that He is.

He reminds that he calls us to an uncomfortable life, so that we won’t ever stop searching him out. He reminds me that sometimes, an uncomfortable life does mean 4 kids, a nice house and a good job. He reminds me that HIS WILL BE DONE.

I don’t know about you, but I want heaven here on earth. I want heaven here on earth.

His will be done.

I know I’m holding on to things I need to let go.

I also know, that I serve a gentle God. I serve a God who doesn’t rip things out of my hands, but rather holds his out so I can place my burdens in his hands.

I know that fear isn’t from Jesus. I know that fear is not from Him. It’s from the enemy, who has no place here.

I don’t know what God has in store.

I’m praying that fear gets lost. That we as a church, we stand up to what we believe in.

I’m praying for a Godly man to enter my life, God willing.

I’m praying for kids. God willing.

I want his will here on earth, in my life.

I’m praying, because I know that Jesus is doing huge things here and I can’t wait to see what he has in store next.

Something that I have began to notice, is that God places these words on my heart in the randomest times. I have began to write poetry doing worship at church, and I wrote this blog during a sermon. He places these words on my heart, and I have to get them out. I think I need to start carrying a notebook around with me, because words are becoming very powerful to me, as I’ve seen Jesus in them.

Huge things are coming. Let’s be bold church. Let’s be bold. Step out. Reach out.

joy filled hugs and sweet sweet blessings,

Nat